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How to write so subjects can understand, aka think like a texter

Our thanks to Twitter stranger Gabriel Hernandez, from whom we shamelessly borrowed the following gem about clear writing:

Me, by text: I can’t, sri.

Me, by email: I’m sorry, but I unfortunately cannot be present.

Me, when writing an academic paper or research protocol: I am henceforth unwillingly prevented from being able to be there.

When writing consent forms and other items for subjects, put yourself in texting mode. Just make sure you use all the requisite vowels, and you’ll be golden. Whatever you do, DON’T cut and paste protocol language into your consent form. Protocols are written for other scientist types. Consent forms are written for people with no scientific background.

Another way to think of it: Don’t use 20 words to express an 8-word idea.